Sour Milk
by falukorv
Summary: What happens when you're forced to confront the reality of nuclear war, and leave everything you knew behind? A story that explores the life of the Sole Survivor before and after the bombs fell. Rated M for future nastiness. ((am i talking about blood or dicks? hoo knows...))


_((Right, so the game isn't published yet, but I don't see why that should stop me. It remains to be seen if I can actually play the game, as my computer doesn't meet the minimum requirements and I'm a poor student, BUUUT! I had so much fun writing this. Be a peach and leave some feedback; I could use all the coaching in the world where my writing is concerned. I'd like to continue this story; hopefully future chapters will be longer and of more substance. Also, the title feels right because...yes. luv u bye))_

* * *

"Turn the radio up."

It was her favorite song. Mildred leaned back in the couch and bobbed her head along to the catchy tune as the notes spilled out of the radio speakers. She plucked a cigarette from a small carton and put it between her lips, earning a look of disapproval from her husband.

"The baby. Mildred, we talked about this. C'mon." He nipped her cheek and pulled the cigarette from her mouth. The end was stained with a touch of her red lipstick. She huffed and leaned her elbow on the arm of the couch, loosely pressing her foot against his ankle. He'd been been like a bloodhound ever since Shaun was born, always right behind her the second he smelled smoke.

"You're starting to chap my ass, Gene." She said this with a sense of humor, of course, but it had been a week since she last smoked, and it wasn't going unnoticed by her body. Nicotine helped her function; not that there wasn't a time when she didn't need it. But she had gotten jittery over the years, and it was the one thing that soothed her mind. It was just as well. Gene wanted the best for the kid, she knew this. She did too, so it didn't hurt her to give up a few commodities in favor of good parenting. But damn, if she couldn't use a smoke right about now.  
She reclaimed the cigarette and tucked the pack away in the pocket of her pants.  
"I'll be right back." She leaned over and gave him a teeny little peck on the cheek with an audible 'mwah' before she went for the door.  
"It's about your health too, ya know!" It fell on deaf ears.

It was a gorgeous day. Clouds, wispy like cotton candy, laid in stark contrast again the deep blue of the sky. The autumn days were beginning to wane towards the colder season ahead. The last month had been an endless succession of gray skies and disappointment, but the powers that be seemed to be taking mercy on her today.

The woman plopped down on the porch, fishing the lighter out of her other pocket and fiddled with it until she got a flame. She lit it and inhaled deeply, blowing the smoke through her nose like a bull. A tingle almost went up her spine at how good it felt; like her insides were being coated with a warm blanket. And on days where there was a cool breeze in the air, it was the very best. Surprising as it was, not a lot of people were out that day.

After a few minutes of pondering, she looked down to the cigarette that was now resting between her index and middle finger. It was damn near short enough to burn her. Stubbing the cigarette out on the stairs, she got up from her resting position and headed back inside.

As if on cue, Shaun started crying in the other room. Gene pretended to be so invested in the newspaper that he didn't hear it, so Mildred jogged half-pace to the nursery to help her son.

"Hey, hey, hey. How you doin'?" She picked him up from the crib and tried rocking him gently in her arms. He was screaming bloody murder at this point. "Shit.." Using one arm to hold her child and the free hand to search for the bottle, she soon found it and gave it a light shake before putting the nozzle up to his mouth. His face softened, and he started downing the stuff like he wasn't gonna see more for a week. A funny grin broke out across her face; just watching the kid sometimes was enough to make her heart flutter. Smaller than a bag of flour from the market, and as soft as a peach. Shaun's eyes were closed now, and his lips finally let go of the mouth piece. He reached out to grab at the air when his mother gently pulled the bottle from his hands, prompting a small giggle from her. Tiny fingers curled around her pinky, and held on tight. Mildred gave him a small kiss on the forehead, and lowered him into the crib.

Gene was standing in the doorway, regarding both of them with a smile. The corners of his eyes always crinkled when he did that; it was one of her favorite things.

"Hey." He stepped up to her and placed his hands around her waist, giving her a small peck on the cheek. "You look so serene."

"I'm always scared I'll crush the thing. He's so damn tiny."

"You're fine. You just gotta practise having a looser grip on things. Did you sign those papers?"

Right. A cheesy looking guy in a beige trenchcoat and a matching fedora had shown up earlier, informing her that she and her family had been preselected for a spot in the local vault, as a "small token of appreciation for the service she'd done the country". He'd noted that these were worrying times; true. Tensions were rising between the west and the east; also true. World War III looming on the horizon? Maybe. The apocalypse? No fucking way. She gave a feigned nod of agreement nonetheless. Mildred had never been one for sensationalism, and the alarmist attitude a lot of people were taking on was starting to grate a little on her nerves.

She could recall a neighbor, Mr. Henderson, going on a tangent about it not too long prior.

"Shit's gonna hit the fan real soon, I'm tellin' ya. And you can bet your ass I'll be ready when it does! These prissy government officials ain't lettin' someone like me in, that's for sure. All the spots are reserved for rich people and democrats!" Mildred noted that his gaze had momentarily flickered to her when he said this. They had never seen eye to eye. He'd made mention of his niece in DC; chatty little thing, with a tendency to blow most details out of proportion for the sake of an interesting story. "My niece in Washington, she's seen all kindsa things goin' down. Our governments tryna sell us this idea that everything is fine, well.." he scoffed, "I ain't buyin'. Mabel's seen troops rollin' in, patrolling the place! If that's not suspicious, I don't know what is. And what with all this talk of atomic shelters bein' built, you know something's up." He'd go on, and on, and on. There had been remarks that he might as well be wearing a tinfoil hat, and Mildred didn't disagree.

Nonetheless, she'd signed without complaint. The representative had seemed anxious. Skittish, almost. He'd laugh nervously inbetween sentences, and seemed pretty insistant she sign the paper. Hell, he'd practically given her no choice, what with the way he was hanging around outside their door.

Codsworth's voice sounding from the livingroom snapped her out of her reflections.

"You ought to come see this!" Codsworth was unusually expressive for a hunk of metal, and his voice was tinged with something that made Mildred uneasy.

"What's he want?" Gene asked, more to himself than to her.

They made their way into the livingroom, and found their attention being directed towards a news broadcast on the TV. Peeking out the window, Mildred observed people rushing down the street, dragging luggage and hurrying their children along.

"We do...we do have..yes, confirmed reports of nuclear detonations. Hitting New York, and Pennsylvania, and..my god.." The reporter buried his face in his hand. As these words reached her ears, her eyes were still fixed on the families outside. A strong hand gripped her wrist; Gene. They were out the door within moments.

"Do you have Shaun!?"  
"Yes, I have him, let's go!"

For a split second she considered running back inside and collecting items that were of sentimental value, but she knew her husband wasn't going to let her. It was sinking in now, and instilling in her was an immediate sense of panic. They ran, and they ran. Surrounding them were countless people, all heading towards the same mark; the vault. She noted a man crouching down on the ground with an open suitcase. His wife was frantic, yelling at him to get up.

"Just help me pack!"  
"Please! We don't have time for this! Please!"

The pair reached the gate, which was being guarded by a military official. A cluster of citizens stood gathered just outside, a cacophony of panicked crying and hollering sounding over the crowd. And at the front of the line was the vault rep that had visited them only a few hours earlier, pleading with the officer.

"This is ridiculous, you have to let me in!"  
"You're not on the list, sir. Step aside."  
"Not on the- I'm a Vault Tec employee! You can't do this!"  
"Sir, step back."  
"I'm going in, and you can't stop me!"

A behemoth of a thing in powerarmor stepped forward and threateningly demonstrated the whirring of a minigun; the rep raised his hands in resignation.  
Mildred and Gene pushed past the crowd, and she tried offering a sympathetic gaze to the man as she passed him by. Judging by the way he looked back at her, it didn't help.

"We're on the list, let us in!"  
"Infant, adult female, adult male... O.K, go ahead." He stepped to the side and gestured for them to proceed. But she couldn't help herself.  
"What's going to happen to all these people?"  
"Ma'am, we are doing all we can, keep moving!"  
Mildred whipped her head around to glance once again at the trenchcoated man that stood defeated outside the gate.

They reached the entrance of the vault; a platform in the shape of gear, outlined with a fresh coat of bright yellow paint. Several people already stood waiting in the center. Orders were being barked at them left and right, and she observed as a vertiberd landed only a few metres away. The air was filled with worried chatter and noise, to the point that she felt she might go into overload. Gene put his arm around her and assured her they were almost there.

"I love you, both of you."  
"We love you too."

A bright flash of light, sparking a collective outcry from the people around them. For a second, everything appeared to be boiling. She almost thought she could feel the corners of her eyes frying to a crisp. Only now was the platform being lowered, and only a second had passed before the blast reverberated. The wind spewed towards her with such force that she almost lost her footing, and she could see the mushroom cloud billowing up towards the sky until her view was replaced with cold metal walls. It was like being in an elevator that was crashing down with all of its weight.

And for what felt like an eternity, everything was just black. Pitch darkness, and a silence so intense that it made her ears ring. As if all of her senses had been cut off and for a moment in time, she just existed in this kind of void, where everything was nothing.

The elevating platform made a loud hiss as it slowed to a stop. Mildred hadn't realized until now that Shaun was shrieking again. Gene was patting his back and shushing him to no avail. She had a migraine that felt akin to a gaping headwound, and she felt like her insides might spill out any second, but she was _alive._ Disassociating, but alive.

"Oh my god..."

Her eyes welled with tears that burned, but did not spill. Instead, she stood, hand covering her mouth as she stared at Gene.

"Oh my god." she repeated, muffled this time. Every hair on her body stood. When she first lowered her hands and opened her mouth to speak, what came out was nothing but a small croak. Barely audible. It felt like her tongue hadn't tasted a drop of water in centuries. "Can I hold him?" she managed, after a few moments of recollecting herself. Gene allowed her to take Shaun into her arms, and the mothers body wracked with quiet sobs as she embraced the child. His face was red and snot was smeared across his cheeks, but the crying had come to a full stop now. Doe-like eyes stared up at her. In the dim light of the elevator, they were the shade of deepest space.

Shaun had taken on a lot of his father's physical attributes, but the eyes were her very own. The color of freshly turned earth, kissed by autumn rain and promising to sprout new life from dormant seeds come spring time. Mildred liked to trace his freckles with her fingers, and Shaun didn't seem to mind his mother poking his face that much.

And he was so beautiful. He really was so, so, so beautiful. It made her heart ache. It made her soul feel like it was going to brim over.

Mildred was shaking now, visibly. She handed Shaun over to Gene, and stepped off the elevator.

"Come on. Let's see what happens next."


End file.
